


Titaliya

by Jules Raina (Arushi)



Category: Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon? | What Shall I Name This Love?
Genre: F/M, Gen, India, Indian, indian tv, ipkknd, iss pyaar ko kya naam doon - Freeform, serial
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-24
Updated: 2020-01-24
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:09:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22390801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arushi/pseuds/Jules%20Raina
Summary: An Arshi fanfiction.Her Buaji used to call her 'Titaliya'. A butterfly. Finally, Khushi's metamorphosed.
Relationships: Khushi Kumari Gupta/Arnav Singh Raizada
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	1. Chapter 1

She had her eyes closed the entire time. From the second his white SUV left the Shantivan grounds, he drove like a mad man. He knew of her fear, yet he never slowed down.

"Arnavji," she said softly.

"Shut up," came his harsh reply.

After that she didn't open her mouth. It was always like this with him. Euphoria or misery. Love or hatred. There was never the pleasantness of a middle ground.

The SUV screeched to a stop, and she opened her eyes. They were in front of a temple. In the middle of nowhere. First Shyam, and now this.

 _Jeeji has to get married_ , she reminded herself. Anything was worth Payal's happiness. Especially because Khushi had ruined it the last time.

He got out of the car and slammed the door closed. She stepped out hesitantly, stumbling over the long skirt of her lehenga. He didn't look back and headed up the few stairs to the temple.

There was no priest. There were no people. It was a place that looked to be the home of ghosts than gods. She couldn't believe she was getting married in such a desolate place. Even the idol of Devi Mayya was neglected, covered with cobwebs and dust.

He took out the mangalsutra and tied it around her neck. Unceremoniously, before she had a chance to even prepare herself for it. It didn't feel like a marriage. It felt like a punishment. The mangalsutra around her neck felt like a mark of shame.

Sindoor was placed on her forehead, and before she knew it she was in the car again. She was in shock. The man beside her was a monster. She was too in shock to even fear the speed at which they went back home.

What would her parents say? Her poor Babuji, her Amma. She couldn't tell anyone the truth. She didn't completely understand it herself.

She looked at the man beside her. He looked the same as the first day they met. Heartless, arrogant, and a stranger. It was like nothing had ever existed between them. Not friendship, not memories, and certainly not love.

 _He probably never loved me_ , Khushi thought. She had started to dream of marrying him, yes, but not like this. She'd dreamed of a mandap and their family smiling as they went through all the rituals. She dreamed of happiness and content. This... this was hell.

Shantivan was in front of them, and the mansion had never looked so terrifying. Decked out in gold and silver, twinkling with all the wedding finery, the house was about to be shaken to its core.

They stepped through the main door and she saw her Jeeji first. Happy and laughing one second, frozen the next. Everyone gathered around her. Arnavji stood beside her like a statue. She was the only vulnerable. She was the only one they could hurt.

Hurt her they did. With their words, with the palm of Amma's hand. Her head hurt from the crying and her heart from the insults. She took refuge by the poolside, as far as she could get from her so-called husband.

She knew the family wouldn't forgive her easily, if they did at all. In six months, she would have nowhere to go. The worst thing, she felt blind. She knew nothing. Why she had been forced to marry Arnav. Why he was suddenly treating her like dirt.

He treated her like that because he could. He was the great ASR. He broke Lavanya's heart on the day they were supposed to be engaged. He forced her to go to an abandoned building. He was ruthless, because he could be. Because he had money.

Khushi wondered for the first time if her life would've been different with the wealth she turned down as a child. Her Jeeji would've been married in Lucknow itself. She would've never had to go door to door selling sarees and earning the nickname Phati Saadi. Her Babuji's treatment would be done at the best hospitals and most of all... perhaps she wouldn't have been at the mercy of someone as cruel as Arnav Singh Raizada.

The question that bothered at the end of all her turbulent thoughts was still... why? She never hurt Arnavji. She never did anything to deserve the humiliation she'd just faced. They all blamed her. She wondered if even Naniji and Anjaliji thought of her like Mamiji did. A gold-digger.

Inside the room he was working on his laptop and berating Aman through his bluetooth.

"I need to talk to you," Khushi said.

He ignored her. She walked up to him and folded his laptop shut. 

"What do you think you're doing?" he yelled.

Khushi flinched. She remembered all the times he grabbed her wrist, her arms. He wasn't a gentle man. When she opened them he was ready to let loose another barrage of insults. She straightened up. That was all he could do - insult her. She'd received enough insults that night. Another few would hardly hurt.

"Why did you marry me?" she asked.

"I have work, Khushi Kumari Gupta. Get out," Arnav said.

"Answer my question and I'll go."

"Get out!" he yelled.

She shook with fear. So this was the true Arnav Singh Raizada. Not the man who brought her bangles or danced with her when she needed a partner. The poolside was cold, and her lehenga offered hardly any protection. She shivered until dawn, alone with her thoughts.

He was asleep when she entered the room to go to the washroom. How could a person sleep after creating such havoc? Khushi let out a dry laugh. Arnav could hardly be called a person. His laptop was still open, and a picture was on the screen.

Her and Shyam in Lakshmi Nagar. It was at one of the neighbors' wedding. She looked happy next to the disgusting man. She shut the laptop, unable to look at the picture any longer. It made her blood boil, thinking of how stupid and trusting she had been. Her hand froze on the surface of the laptop.

Arnav had seen it. He knew. She fell into the recliner, unable to process the new revelation. He knew about Shyam. Khushi knew Arnav. It felt strange to think of him like that, when he behaved with her like ASR again. Arnav acted on impulse. He acted first and thought later.

Everyone in Lakshmi Nagar thought she and Shyam had loved each other. The graffiti on the walls further spread the rumors. Buaji had even told all their neighbors of their engagement.

If Arnav had suspected something and enquired, she would look just as guilty as Shyam did. She visited their house. She regretted more than ever not coming clean about what Shyam had done to her and their family.

She finally knew what her marriage was. It wasn't havoc, it wasn't unexplained... it was revenge. She looked at the sleeping form of the man she'd dreamed up an entire future with and felt sick to her stomach.

Khushi knew what she had to do.


	2. 2

It wasn't even a half-an-hour since sunrise. No one in Shantivan was awake yet. She cursed herself for not buying a cellphone. Thankfully, none of the Prakash brothers were awake yet. She paused before descending down to the living room.

Maybe her family would forgive her quickly. They were all kind people. Perhaps things could be resolved by talking. She chuckled. The idea of Arnav Singh Raizada listening to her side of the story was laughable. He'd already come to his own conclusions, and been sure enough of his assumptions to ruin her life.

Even if it was resolved, her future was unclear. She couldn't go back home to Amma and Babuji. Shantivan would be left in shambles if the truth came out. Khushi knew Anjaliji wouldn't easily accept reality. And there was her pregnancy to think about.

She and Shyam were the problem. Shyam wouldn't leave Shantivan, but she could. She could disappear forever. Even the Raizadas would never find her.

Before she knew it she was at the landline. She checked to make sure no one was around, and dialled the number. Khushi never thought she would use the number, but it was stuck in her mind. Every year a gift arrived on her birthday with a card and the phone number written on it. Every year, she received the invitation to leave her family behind. Now, she was finally taking it.

The phone rang and rang. Khushi realized it was only five in the morning. There was a chance no one would pick up. And if they called back later in the day... it would be a disaster if one of the Raizadas picked up.

"Hello?" a wavering voice asked.

"Hello, Nani?" Khushi whispered. "It's me, Khushi."

***

She heard fumbling at the other end, what she imagined to be blankets thrown off the bed and standing up.

"Beta," her grandmother breathed.

It was wonderful hearing a friendly voice. So much had changed in twenty hours that one kind word broke her. She let out a sob.

"Nani," she whispered into the phone. "Please take me away from here."

"Where are you, beta?" Her nani asked.

"Shantivan, Delhi," Khushi replied. "I have to leave Amma and Babuji behind, Nani. I have to disappear from here."

The old woman scoffed.

"They were never your Amma and Babuji in the first place, beta. Pack your things. I'll be there in two hours."

"Nani, I'll be waiting for you at the Durga temple near Shantivan. I have to leave now."

Her grandmother stayed silent for a moment.

"Beta... what happened?" Her nani asked.

"I'll tell you everything once we meet, Nani."

"I'll send some of my Delhi branch employees to meet you at the temple. They will take care of you, darling."

"I'll see you soon, Nani."

 _Not soon enough_ , Khushi's Nani thought.

***

Khushi hurried out of Shantivan. The guard at the gate was awake, but she told him she needed to go home to get something for a pooja for the newly married couple. She hid her mangalsutra and the sindoor had been washed off.

The temple was ten minutes away. She prayed no one in Shantivan noticed her absence till she was gone. Then she realized, praying had done nothing for her so far and simply walked faster.

She was the first devotee at the temple and sat leaning against one of the pillars. Finally, she was doing what her Nani wanted for her for over a decade. She was taking the responsibilities that she'd avoided all these years. It hadn't been of her own choice, but it felt right.

She was never really Khushi Kumari Gupta. She certainly wasn't Khushi Singh Raizada. She was a Bharadwaj.

"Madam?" a man said.

Four men in black safari suits stood in front of her. Khushi startled at their presence. Two black sedans were parked in front of the stairs to the temple.

"Ma'am, Sharda ma'am has sent us to accompany you to your hotel room," the man in front said.

She got up. Her head spun for a second. She remembered that she hadn't had anything to eat since lunch the day before. Stupidly, she realized she was craving jalebi.

"Are you alright, ma'am?" the man asked, his hands outstretched to catch her.

"I'm fine, just a bit weak," she answered. "Thank you for coming so early in the morning. I'm sorry my nani and I had to inconvenience you all."

The man gave her a friendly smile.

"It's no problem at all, Khushi ma'am," he said. "We're the security of Bharadwaj Group's Delhi branch headquarters. We were on shift already."

"You know my name?" Khushi asked.

She didn't realize her existence was even known to the people of Bharadwaj Group. All those years ago, her Nani had seemed so stern and unsentimental.

"Ma'am, your grandmother named Khushi Bakery after you," the man replied. "Did you forget?"

Tears welled up in her eyes. The bakeries were everywhere, and she thought it was just a happy coincidence. A pastry shop named after her, a girl who lived on sweets. She'd never even been inside one of the branches of the bakery.

She sat in the car, next to a suit-clad woman was speaking on her cellphone. The woman whispered into the cellphone and handed it to Khushi. Hesitantly, she took it and said hello.

"Beta, I've arranged for you to stay at the Radisson until I get there. If you need anything, just tell Aditi and she'll arrange it for you. Don't worry, no matter what it is... she'll get it for you. She's quite competent."

Khushi wanted her old life back. She doubted Aditi could arrange that, no matter how competent she was. She leaned back against the leather seats and closed her eyes. She wanted her Jeeji back, her father to walk again, and for everything wrong in her life to right itself.

They arrived at the Radisson. The manager showed Khushi her suite. Maids brought up a continental breakfast. Khushi looked at the unfamiliar food and sighed. She had wanted aloo paratha.

 _No Khushi, that was your old life,_ she thought. _This is your life now._

Only, she didn't know how to properly use the cutlery. She saw actresses doing it in movies, but never had to use it in real life. Aditi was the only one in the room, but Khushi didn't want to make a fool of herself in front of anyone anymore. The days of besan on her face and dressing up like her sister's mother-in-law were over.

Aditi sat opposite her and demonstrated how to hold the fork and knife. She made no show of it, and didn't say a word. Khushi slowly followed her lead and had her breakfast. It was different from her usual fare, but she liked the change.

"Do you need anything, ma'am?" Aditi asked. "Clothes, toiletries?"

Khushi slapped her hand to her forehead. She had walked out of Shantivan with nothing. At the most, she had a few hundred rupees on her.

"I have to get my things from Lakshmi Nagar," she told Aditi. "My clothes, my bag... "

Aditi shook her head.

"I'm sorry, ma'am," she said. "I don't think it's wise for you to go Lakshmi Nagar now. I'll have some clothes and essentials brought up to you. You need a phone as well. It'll be here by the time Sharda ma'am gets here."

"You don't need to call me 'ma'am'", Khushi said. It felt uncomfortable. Aditi was polished perfection in her tailored burgundy suit and makeup. She commanded everyone around her with confidence. Meanwhile, Khushi... Khushi was dressed in clothing and jewelry from the day before. Even after washing her face, the tear stains refused to completely go away. Her hair was a mess. _She_ was a mess, and people were calling her 'ma'am'.

It was the power of money, Khushi realized. Money had worked magic in the few hours since she'd accepted her inheritance.

"When will my nani get here?" Khushi asked Aditi.

Checking her watch, Aditi replied, "Another hour or two. She's in Mumbai at present."

"Mumbai," Khushi wondered out loud. She liked the sound of the city on her tongue. The old Khushi would've thought immediately it was where Salman Khanji lived. The new Khushi thought it sounded like a clean slate.

"Is that where Nani lives?"

Aditi was typing on her phone, but she responded to Khushi's question without pause.

"Oh no. Sharda ma'am doesn't have a permanent home. She says there's no one to go back to. She just lives in whichever city she needs to."

Khushi felt guilt form in her gut at Aditi's casual remark. After her parents died, she had to choose between her Nani and Amma. Her Nani told her she planned to send her to boarding school, to give her best the world could offer. All that the young Khushi heard was that her grandmother wanted to send her away. On the other hand, Amma came along with Jeeji. The thought of having an older sister was enough to make her reject her grandmother's care.

Did she regret it? Khushi didn't know. The maid brought in two cups of tea and Aditi motioned for her to have some.

"This tastes different," Khushi commented.

"It's Gao Shan tea," Aditi told her. "Your Nani and I tried it in Taiwan. She's loved it ever since."

"It's wonderful."

Aditi set her teacup down. Khushi hadn't noticed the cups when they were brought in, but looking at Aditi's made her own hand shiver. The cups were beautiful, and obviously fragile.

"The tea set is bone china," Aditi said.

Khushi was embarrassed. So this was how the rich truly lived. She knew absolutely nothing.

"I'm not telling you about these to embarrass you, ma'am," Aditi continued. "These trivial things will become part of your everyday life. It won't be jalebis and pakora anymore. Your life changed the second you called Sharda ma'am. The sooner you adjust, the better. All the paintings in this room are Manet. Copies of course, but decent replicas. Manet, mind you, not Monet. The table we're using is a Queen Anne."

She paused when she saw Khushi's round, frightened eyes.

"This is only the beginning, ma'am. You'll need private tutors. I heard you stopped your studies after twelfth standard because your adoptive parents needed the money for your sister's wedding. A one year-gap is not a big deal. And your marks are quite good. You'll have private tutors assigned to you starting tomorrow. Ma'am also spoke of an etiquette teacher, dance teacher, tennis coach, cosmetologist, and nutritionist while I was on the phone with her."

Khushi wondered if there would be any time left in her life to breathe. She shook her head. She didn't want time where she would be alone with her thoughts. Ten years before, her grandmother's plans of filling every minute of her life with academics and skills scared her. Now, it sounded blissful. All she would have to do is work.

The clothes were brought in. The only name she recognized was Zara, a brand Lavanyaji had liked. The others all looked even more expensive. She doubted whether any of the bags contained her preferred salwar suits. Boxes of cosmetics and toiletries were brought in.

Aditi withdrew a pale grey blouse and black slacks. Khushi thanked the heavens it wasn't like one of Lavanyaji's dresses or a skirt. Aditi passed the bags of underwear to Khushi to pick out.

"How did you-"

"I'm good at guessing. I used to work as a model on the side, and I bought a range of sizes just in case."

There was a knock at the door after she came out from her shower. The security man from before brought a small box.

"Your new phone," Aditi said, handing it to her. The phone reminded Khushi of something.

"Aditiji," she said. "I need to send a voice message to someone. Just one. And they should never be able to contact me again."

"You need a burner phone," Aditi told her. She took out a small banged up smartphone from her bag. "I keep one in my bag. Used to work as a private detective for a while."

Khushi balked at her for a second. She took the phone and walked out onto the balcony. All of Delhi was visible, and she took it in. If all went well, it would be a long time- or forever, before she came to the city again.

She recorded the message she wanted to send to Arnavji.

"Hello Arnavji. Please listen to my entire message. I know why you married me. You think I was having an affair with your brother-in-law. That's not true. He pretended to be unmarried, and stayed as a paying guest in our house in Laxmi Nagar. He was the one I broke off my engagement with, when I found out who he really was. That hasn't stopped him. You probably won't believe me, but if you hire a good detective... I'm sure you'll find the truth.

Second thing, I'm going away. You'll never find me. I'm not going to destroy your sister's marriage, so please don't destroy Payal's. Even if I had stayed for six months, I'd have had to disappear after. Now, we don't have to see each others' faces. If our families ask, tell them whatever you want to.

Finally, Mr. Raizada. I hope you suffer for what you did to me. If I was the kind of person that wanted revenge, I would make you regret the day you were born. Stay. Away. From. Me."

Khushi cut the call and leaned on the balcony's balustrade. She breathed deeply. She listened to her message again. It didn't sound like Khushi Kumari Gupta. Then again, she didn't want to be that pushover anymore.

"Ma'am, Sharda ma'am is here," Aditi shouted from the room.


	3. Chapter 3

It was ten years since she'd seen her grandmother. Sharda had walked away dejected that day, leaving her only grandchild behind in the hands of a couple she thought woefully ill-equipped.

"Beta, you've gotten so thin," her Nani said as she walked in.

Khushi smiled. Grandparents were always the same, it seemed. She walked forward and hugged her Nani. She regretted all the years she'd never visited. All the years that she'd bowed to Garima and Shashi's silent request to keep Nani out of her life.

New wrinkles had formed on Sharda's face. Her once dyed hair was now a shimmering silver, styled elegantly in a layered bob. Simple platinum jewelry shimmered at her wrists and ears. Sharda wore a simple kurti and palazzos. She slid off her Gucci sunglasses and took another look at her.

"Nice to see Aditi took over your wardrobe," she commented. "Aditi, darling, call for some tea, will you? The flight here was terrible. I really do need to buy a private jet."

Sharda placed her hands on Khushi's hair and smoothed it down.

"Now, beta. Tell Nani what happened."

The tears which were all but forgotten started again. She leaned on to her nani's shoulder. Khushi worried her tears would soak through Sharda's designer kurti, but the tears just didn't stop. Her nani patted her back and urged her to disclose what had happened.

Khushi started at the beginning. At the ill-fated wedding in Lucknow and her public humiliation. She told her Nani everything, and couldn't stop even as she watched Sharda's anger rise. She told her Nani about how she almost loved the man that was the cause of her ruin.

"Aditi," her Nani growled. "Every media channel who broadcast this... End them. And that Arnav Singh Whatever... let's show him-"

Khushi interrupted, "Nani. I just want to leave this all behind. Let them live as they wish. I don't want to go out of my way to destroy things. I want to look towards the future."

"Yes, you said you wanted to disappear?" her Nani asked. "I have a way to do that."

***

Her grandmother took her around Delhi, to parts of the city Khushi had never seen before. They travelled in a fleet of black sedans with tinted windows. Nani added a pretty black wide-brimmed hat to Khushi's ensemble to make sure no one on the roads caught sight of her face. High-end boutiques, a hair salon, a spa, to lunch at a upscale restaurant with more unfamiliar foreign food, and finally back at the hotel.

She recalled how in the past she had even stopped talking about her nani. When the little girls that came for the Kanya Pooja asked about her Nani, she told them should would tell them later.

It wasn't the money her Nani spent that melted Khushi's heart and bridged the gap of a decade of unfamiliarity. It was the care. She hovered around Khushi, tweaking this and adjusting that. Every time something looked good her Nani clapped her hands together and looked proud. During the entire day, they'd walked through Delhi holding hands and giggling like schoolgirls.

Khushi looked at herself in the floor-length mirror. Her new shoulder-length hair was tipped in pink, as she requested it. Her nails shone with a fresh manicure. The outfit Aditi chose had been replaced by a pretty white and blue sundress, properly accessorized with nude block heeled sandals. It felt strange, wearing something that revealed any part of her legs above her ankles. Khushi looked into the mirror and steeled herself. This was her future. She couldn't let the old Khushi of Lucknow, sheltered girl and perpetual sacrificial goat, get in her way.

She twirled around, and the skirt moved like a song. She felt like a new person. She'd lived in the city for a year and still been called a country bumpkin. Chamkili. Now, in one day, she finally looked the part of a city girl.

The only thing that stood out was the mangalsutra around her neck. She took it off quickly and replaced it with a small diamond pendant her Nani had brought her from New York. The mangalsutra went into the jewelry box. Out of sight, but not out of her mind.

For the first time in her life, she felt truly beautiful, truly herself. She would turn heads. Looking the way she did, it wouldn't be easy to disappear. But it was easy to be someone very unlike Khushi Kumari Gupta. She stepped out of the bathroom to the waiting gaze of her Nani.

"Nani. This is all very-"

"Have you ever heard this, beta? The best place to hide is in plain sight."

She never had. Looking the way she did, it made sense. Half the people in Laxmi Nagar wouldn't recognize her now. She twirled around once for Nani. Aditi applauded and smiled.

"Now comes the hard part, beta. Appearance, we can change in a matter of minutes... It is the rest that is difficult. You've accepted that you are a Bharadwaj. The expectations people have from you have just increased exponentially. What do you want to do with this valuable life of yours, beta?"

Her Nani looked at her in expectation. For the first time, Khushi had no words. No one had ever asked her what she wanted to do. There were no conditions in her Nani's question. She could be free to do anything she wanted, as long as she reached Nani's expectation of perfection. Whether she wanted to be a chef or a seamstress, an actress or a businesswoman, her Nani would want her to be the best in her field. Her Nani would help her make all her dreams come true.

The old Khushi would've wanted to open a sweet shop. But she didn't want a simple life anymore. Simple lives were easy to mess with, easy to uproot. Khushi spent so much of her life feeling powerless. Now, she wanted power.

Khushi leaned forward with her hands on her hips. She shared a conspiratorial smile with her Nani.

"I want to be everything you want me to be, Nani."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there, this is a work I posted on Wattpad. But Wattpad's crap and AO3 is the place to be, so I'm posting here.


	4. Chapter 4

Arnav drove through the streets around Shantivan. He had woken up to see his room and the poolside empty. He wasn't worried at first. Khushi was just the girl bent on destroying his sister's life. She could sleep in the storeroom if she felt so uncomfortable around him.

The family all descended for breakfast, and she was nowhere to be found. He wondered if something had happened. Shyam was sitting at the dinner table, and from the expression on his face, just as clueless as Arnav.

After questioning the security guard, he fired the man. One of the shopkeepers nearby saw Khushi going towards the nearby temple, but no one at the temple had even seen her. It wasn't surprising, considering she'd left the house at daybreak.

She had nothing with her. No clothes or money. She just left, as if she'd never been there in the first place. Arnav leaned back into the seat of his SUV. He'd already called Laxmi Nagar, and she wasn't there. She had no other friends in the city. In his desperation, he even called Lavanya- who turned out to be in London.

He told himself it was because he wanted her in his sight, to prevent her from destroying Di's life. He told himself he was searching for her because he needed to control her. But even in his mind, his excuses were flimsy.

Even after everything she did, all that he saw... he cared for her. He hated himself for it. Di had sacrificed so much for him, and he loved the one girl on the planet that he shouldn't. Khushi, with her too-pure Hindi and her sanskaar.

She probably hadn't had anything to eat. It was nearing lunch, and she had no money and nowhere to go. She would be dressed in that ridiculous lehenga. She was probably still crying. She was alone. He thought of all the things that could go wrong, and slammed his fist against the steering wheel..

His phone vibrated with a message. It was a voice message from an unknown number. He played it.

"Hello Arnavji."

Thank goodness she was alive. He closed his eyes in relief and leaned back into the seat.

"Please listen to my entire message. I know why you married me. You think I was having an affair with your brother-in-law. That's not true. He pretended to be unmarried, and stayed as a paying guest in our house in Laxmi Nagar. He was the one I broke off my engagement with, when I found out who he really was. That hasn't stopped him. You probably won't believe me, but if you hire a good detective... I'm sure you'll find the truth."

He didn't want to believe her. If she spoke the truth, he had committed the biggest mistake of his life. Why hadn't he thought of hiring a detective? He had gone and impulsively married her, alienated her from her family and his, and ruined her life.

"Second thing, I'm going away. Forever. You'll never find me. I'm not going to destroy your sister's marriage, so please don't destroy Payal's. Even if I had stayed for six months, I'd have had to disappear after. My family isn't the kind to accept a divorcee with open arms. Especially considering the circumstances. This way, we don't have to see each others' faces for six months. If our families ask, tell them whatever you want to. Tell them I died, maybe that's the best option. Answering their questions is your problem now."

She sounded so confident. She was just a young girl in a city she didn't even know that well. Something in Khushi had changed. It hurt that she said she didn't want to see his face. He knew he had said much worse things to her all through their time together. It still hurt. He remembered the slaps and insults she received the night before. Why hadn't he thought to at least stop them from hitting her? He of all people knew she bruised easily.

"Finally, Mr. Raizada. I hope you suffer for what you did to me. If I was the kind of person that wanted revenge, I would make you regret the day you were born. I'm not, so I'm just asking you this. Stay. Away. From. Me."

Click.

As soon as the voice message ended he called Aman.

"Aman, I need you to trace a phone number," he said. He forwarded the number and drove back to Shantivan.

The family was sitting in the living room. Payal was silently crying as Akash comforted her. All the others glared at him as soon as he entered.

"What did you do, Chote?" Anjali asked. "Where is Khushiji?"

He ignored her and started to go to his room. She stepped in front of him and stopped him.

"I asked you a question, Arnav."

It wasn't often his sister used his given name. She was serious. Khushi was right. Answering the family's questions was his problem now.

"I didn't do anything, Di. I'm looking for Khushi."

"What did you do to make her run away in the first place?!" Payal screamed.

Payal wiped away her tears and stood up. She pushed Akash's hands off of her shoulders.

"What did you do, Arnavji? My sister would never marry like that. She was crying all of yesterday night. She wouldn't answer a single question we asked. She was slapped and insulted. You did something. It's always you... It was you in Lucknow, and it is you here! Always out to torture my sister!"

"Bhai, what is Payal saying about Lucknow?" Akash asked.

"Your brother leaked a video of Khushi to the media. She accidentally walked in on his fashion show and fell. There was a video, and he leaked it. We had to leave Lucknow thanks to your brother," Payal spat out. "Khushi was harassed by goons thanks to your brother. My wedding in Lucknow was stopped because of your brother!"

"Hello hi, Khoonbari Tang," Mami said. "Who do you think you are saying such things about our Arnav bitwa?"

Payal held her hand up.

"Bas, Maaji. You can say whatever you want about me, and you do... all the time. But I know your Arnav is the one at fault here. My sister could be hurt, or dea--"

Akash tried to subdue her, but the usually meek Payal shot him a look and he retreated.

"I am willing to leave this house if my sister isn't found. I'll probably leave with her if she is. You did something to her. Can you deny it, Arnavji?"

Arnav lowered his head and said nothing.

Anjali fell back into the sofa. She shook her head. Nani too was in shock.

"It's true, then."

His sister had tears in her eyes, the very thing he tried so hard to avoid.

"Find Khushiji, Chote. And make everything right. I won't forgive you if you don't."

Shyam pretended concern for Anjali and stroked her hair.

"Rani Saheba is right, saale saab. It's a dangerous city, and she's all alone. Please find her soon."

He clenched his fist and headed upstairs. Tell them I'm dead. Khushi had said the sentence with such abandon. Was she planning on really dying?

She was deeply religious, believed marriage was a once in a lifetime thing. She believed in love and rainbows and all that nonsense. But she wasn't so weak as to commit suicide, was she?

You'll never find me.

Khushi didn't have the resources to disappear. She had no one to turn to. She didn't even have a passport. He wasn't sure she even had her own bank account. He called Aman again.

"Where are we on that phone number?"

"Untraceable, sir. Whoever sent it did not want to be found."

Untraceable? The girl he knew didn't even own a proper smartphone. Someone was helping her. Or else, someone had forced her to say what she said in the message.

He shrugged off his coat and threw it into the recliner. Nothing made sense anymore. He had a sinking feeling that Khushi was lost to him. There was only one thing he could do. He picked up his phone again.

"Aman, I want an investigation on Shyam Manohar Jha. The works," he said. "Report back as soon as possible. I want to know why he stayed at Laxmi Nagar, what he did there, everything."

He called Akash next.

"Akash, I need to speak to you and Payal. Come to my room."

Within twenty four hours his life had turned into hell. If Payal and Aman confirmed what Khushi said, he had stomped on the heart of a girl he could've lived his entire life with. A lifetime of a regret wouldn't be enough, but perhaps it would be all that he'd be left with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi people. Feel free to comment what you think.


	5. Chapter 5

Payal stepped into the room. He remembered the first time he'd seen her with Akash. So frightened, so meek. It was a different woman that walked into his room and sat on his recliner, and she looked at him with a murderous glare. His laptop was open again. Her eyes widened as she saw the picture.

Akash sat next to her. Arnav's phone buzzed again. From the last two hours he'd been receiving proofs of Shyam's betrayal. Why hadn't he done this sooner? Arnav behaved as if no one took better care of his family. How could he be blind to Shyam for so long?

"Bhai, what is this? Why is Jeejaji in Laxmi Nagar?"

Payal suspected something like this would happen. Her Khushi should have told Anjali the truth the second she found out, instead of caring about the Raizadas. She had suffered under Shyam's gaze, avoided his advances, and for what?

"Do you want to tell him, Payal?" Arnav asked. Payal glared at him.

"Shyam Jha saved Khushi from some goons in Lucknow. When we came to Delhi, he stayed in Buaji's house as a paying guest. He never told us he was married. Buaji wanted to get him married to Khushi."

"Was he the one she was engaged to?"

"Yes," Payal breathed out. "She wanted to tell Anjaliji. But Khushi didn't think your sister could handle it. Then the preparations for our wedding started. And Anjaliji got pregnant. She was hoping Shyam would stop. We should have told everyone, we should have--"

Arnav kept waiting for Aman to call. She should've been found by now. He didn't want to rush into a police report, especially with the voice message she sent him. It was probably enough proof she left willingly. They weren't legally married, and he had no right over her.

"She sent me a voice message this morning," he said.

"Play it," Payal ordered. "Who knows? This might be the last time I hear my sister's voice."

They heard the voice message. Payal understood who Khushi had gone to immediately. She didn't blame her. Khushi would've lived the life of a princess if she'd gone with her Nani that day. Instead, because she wanted a Jeeji she became the daughter of a halwai.

"The call came from an untraceable number. I've had people searching everywhere, but they can't find her."

"Stop," Payal said. "She asked you to not destroy my marriage... You threatened to stop my wedding unless she married you? That's what you did, isn't it?"

Arnav looked away. His shame couldn't be put into words. If there was anyone he needed to apologize to after Khushi, it was Payal.

"I'm sorry, Payal."

"Will your sorry fix anything? Will it bring me back my sister?"

Khushi was gone for good. Sharda Nani would never let her return to their parents. She doubted Khushi would even want to, after going through so much.

Payal asked, "What are you going to do about Shyam?"

"Do you think he had something to do with this?" Akash asked.

Payal shook her head. She knew Khushi was safe. Sharda Nani was stern, but she was powerful enough to take Khushi away and protect her.

"No. I know where Khushi went," Payal answered. "She'll be safe there. Happy too, for the rest of her life."

"Where, Payalji?" Akash asked.

"I want to let her live in peace, Akashji. I'm not going to let your monster of a brother find out where she is."

She got up to leave the room, and turned around at the door.

"I'll start packing my bags. I have no intention of staying in this house with these kind of people."

She had tears in her eyes.

"My sister left all of us behind to protect me. The least I can do is leave you, Akashji."

Before Akash could respond, Payal left the room.

"Bhai, I can't let her leave me," Akash told him. He looked straight ahead, refusing to look at his brother. To think Arnav had messed with Payal's life so much. He thought his brother protected his family from the entire world. But he used them all like chess pieces. Akash was the dutiful right-hand. Payal became a hostage in his haphazard attempt to protect Anjali. And poor Khushiji... He remembered the way the family had all attacked her the night before. Even he'd been furious at Khushi.

***

He went into his bedroom, where Payal was throwing all of her clothes into suitcases while sobbing. He didn't say anything, and started taking his clothes out as well. He took out another suitcase and started packing.

"Payal?"

Payal dropped the saree she was holding and sat down. She didn't want to leave him. He looked at her, so confused and miserable. She tried to hold back her tears.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. It was Khushi's secret to tell, and she made me promise to wait until the wedding. I know it was wrong, but do you think Anjaliji can handle the truth?"

"No," Akash agreed. "She can't."

"I'm going back to Buaji's house," Payal told him.

"Wherever you go, I want to be there with you," he said.

Payal never expected him to come with her. Not with his overbearing mother, not with his blind devotion to his brother. She didn't even know if she wanted to take him away from his family. Would she become as evil to them as Khushi had been the night before? The Raizadas were quick to judge everyone they considered outsiders.

"This is your family," she said.

"So are you. We'll figure this out."

***

Arnav was filled with dread. Akash was the one always by his side. It was true, Arnav had always loved Anjali more and never been afraid to show it. His one mistake was a catalyst. He hadn't just uprooted Khushi's life, he had messed with Payal's as well.

It felt like all the threads grounding him to his home and his happiness were being cut away. He was being untethered from the world, and the feeling of loss.. The feeling of _being_ lost was profound and unbearable.

He looked through Shyam's deceptions and the leads into where Khushi might have gone until it was time for dinner. He didn't want to go downstairs. But he needed to take his medicine and eat. He couldn't be hospitalized and delay his search for Khushi.

When he went down to dinner, Akash and Payal were at the dinner table. The atmosphere was strained. They were all sitting together, but each involved in their own thoughts. Akash cleared his throat as Arnav entered.

"I have something to say to everyone," Akash said.

He looked around at everyone.

"I was offered a job at Maison de Merveilles two weeks ago," Akash said. "I've decided to take it."

"But, Akasha bitwa.. You already have a job, no?" Mamiji asked. "Why this hurry-burry for a new job? Mansion day Marvelous.. I've never heard of it."

"Maison de Merveilles. It's a fashion house in Paris, Ma," Akash answered. "They've offered me the position of CFO. It's a two-year contract. They've promised me a house in Paris. They'll take care of everything."

"Akash, what about AR Designs?" Arnav asked.

Akash ignored him. It would've been better if he'd glared or given an angry response.

"Akash, but you'll have to go to France," Anjali said.

"I think it's a good thing, Di. We need to get away from this madness."

Mamiji started crying and left the table. Akash and Payal went after her. She sat in her room and threw things at the two that were trying to enter.

"Not been married one day and this Khoonbari Tang already has my son leaving me!" she yelled.

Akash rushed through the door, avoiding a flying pillow and holding his mother's hands. Payal stood back at the door.

"Ma, who said we were going alone? You're coming with us," Akash told her.

"Ji, Maaji," Payal said. She finally took the courage and walked closer. "Akashji got a job in the fashion capital of the world. How could we leave you behind?"

Akash and Payal both sat on the bed and Mami wiped her tears. She looked at Payal.

"Payal bitiya," she started. She cleared her throat. She could get used to calling her daughter-in-law by her name. "Payal bitiya, my makeup is all good, no?"

"Yes, Maaji," Payal answered. "You're perfect."

"Start packing, Ma" Akash said. "Our flight is exactly forty-five days from now. We'll go on a vacation to the south of France before I join in MDM. The fashion house has offered to let me use a villa they have there for two months."

Payal started to leave, but Mami held her hand.

"Payaliya! Stay, no. We need to decide on shopping, jewelries, makeup. We can't look less in front of those France women."

"Ji, Maaji."

Akash left the room to make further arrangements. His mother was finally warming up to Payal. At least one good thing had come out of this nonsense.

Before he could spend a moment in his happiness, he checked his phone and saw a message from Arnav.

_Meet me at the poolside._

He walked over and saw Arnav speaking on the phone. It was Aman. Khushi was still missing. Akash was thankful his wife's sister had disappeared so effectively.

"You wanted to see me, Bhai?"

"Akash. How could you do this?" Arnav asked. "AR is our dream. We worked so hard to build it to this stage."

"AR is your dream," Akash responded. "Bhai, I know you think you're better than me. Maybe you are, in some ways. You're a better businessman. But you're a terrible excuse for a human being."

Arnav recoiled at the insult.

"Akash, I can explain."

"Explain what, bhai? That you had a reason for the terrible things you did. Payal thinks she'll never see her sister again. Thanks to you. You couldn't have waited? You couldn't have _asked_ Khushi and then investigated? The only explanation I see is that you don't care about other people, Bhai. If Khushi had refused to marry you, you would've stopped my wedding. Even after everything I did for you, you would've stopped me from marrying the girl I love."

Akash exhaled and adjusted his glasses.

"I'm Akash Singh Raizada, bhai. But you're the only one that's ASR. You're the one that people flock to. I never minded that. I never minded being in your shadow. But you didn't even think of me that way, did you? You thought I was an idiot that idolized your every word. I'm done with this, Bhai. AR Designs is your dream. You can make the company grow on your own. I quit. From AR Designs, and from ASR."

***

Akash left. It was painful speaking to Arnav that way. But he had to. He couldn't let people walk all over him anymore. He had Payal to protect now. He couldn't trust his brother to not use them for his emotional manipulation. Especially if Arnav managed to find Khushi.

Anjali and Nani were sitting in the living room, holding hands and trying to keep the tears from falling. Anjali knew there was some secret behind everyone's sudden behavior. The thought of Khushiji alone and lost frightened her. She'd run away because of Chote. A few days ago everything had been fine. She and Shyamji had received the happiest news of their lives. Everything had changed so much since then.

Shyamji had left the house after lunch and hadn't returned. Anjali needed him, but he hadn't even picked up her calls.

She walked upstairs. At the least, Chote would always be there for her to talk to. And she needed to talk to him more than ever. She needed to know what happened with Khushiji. She walked up the stairs to the poolside.

At the door, she froze. She couldn't go in. Her brother hadn't cried in fifteen years. He was stifling his sobs with his hand, curled up in the corner of the poolside room. Anjali retreated. If she went inside her Chote would only pretend to be fine for her sake. At least, when he was alone, he could let out his emotions in peace.

Their world was turned upside down. All she could do was watch helplessly, just as she did fifteen years before, as it all fell apart and her brother broke into pieces. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys. I've written this story upto Chapter 33, which you can find on Wattpad. I'll keep uploading on here, but I'm sort of new to AO3 so I'm exploring the site and uploading here a bit slowly. 
> 
> https://www.wattpad.com/story/182973600-titaliya


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